Why Saying You “Swiped Right” Should No Longer Be Frowned Upon
Should you tell a self-proclaimed Tita of Manila that you met your significant other via online dating apps like Tinder, you are probably guaranteed the perfect Recipe of Judgment: a raised eyebrow, a restrained smile, and a weighed pause before the utterance of a heavily loaded, “Really?”
Yes, Tita, it has happened: Online datings have worked, whether you like or not. This day and age, a respectable man and an equally accomplished woman may and can decide to meet each other and even fall in love with each other. As such, should the stigma that others inflict on those who find love online continue?
“Love is love is love is love,” Lin-Manuel Miranda says of our LGBTQ+ brethren, but shouldn’t the same be applied to those who initially converse with people through screens, and who, by some twist of fate (or a decent exchange of lines) decide to continue with coffee dates, movie screenings, and park hangouts? If we can celebrate love of all kinds and preferences, shouldn’t we celebrate love regardless of how people met and how they decided to pursue their significant others?
“How do I love thee?” The poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning says. “Let me count the ways.” Allow us to empower everyone who has kept up with the times and has found love in a world that’s both digital and daring… and has led to things delightful and durable. Make no mistake about it: While the good ‘ole “met at the office” or “through a friend” still work, so does a few click of the fingers and a wide array of emojis. Do not be ashamed: Love is for everyone. Here are the reasons why we need to stop the stigma, and let love win.
1. Consider online dating app as a decent platform, not as a disrespectful means of meeting people.
While apps like Tinder are infamous for short-term flings or even casual setups, there are still success stories out there between people who use the app as a regular Messenger platform. Don’t “normal” relationships also begin with a text message or a Facebook friend request? The same can be said for Tinder, as not all people use the app just for a night-out. It can be respectable platform for two strangers to meet, and eventually become friends.
2. Connections among people are still established through these apps.
When one uses apps like Tinder, it is common knowledge that common friends can be seen. Whether this is accurate proof of the theory of six degrees of separation, what are the odds that we could still bump with this online contact soon anyway? The app has just made the meeting become possible. Maybe it’s fate; at times, maybe it’s just chasing after what interests you, and nothing could be more empowering.
3. At the end of the day, how you decide to use your dating app and how you approach your date in real life are another matter.
Admit it: Even those who meet “in real life” do end up not seeing each other anymore after a few dates. The same thing happens for those who use dating apps. The same approach: asking someone out, setting the venue and time for a meeting, and securing future meetups in the coming weeks are all similar. How you use your dating app – hopefully, with responsibility – also falls under your care. Whether you use that app for finding a drinking buddy, selling a product you endorse, or yes, finding true love, that’s on you. Should you find love, no one has the right to judge you for having the cards fall into place. Behold, the power of technology!
The next time a Tita tells you “Ah, talaga?” with all the drops of sweat suddenly appearing on her cheek, smile and say, “Yes, I swiped right, and I don’t regret it.” There is no shame in that. Go get them a copy of Modern Love by Aziz Ansari while you’re at it, and thank the flames of your phone and fate for the happiness you so deserve, even if no buckets of water have been filled and carried to your house. #